Have you ever shared knowledge or information with someone feeling you’ve given them so much value only to see them do nothing with it? Have you left a conversation just knowing you gave the other person the answers to the problems they laid out for you only to see them in the near future still tussling with the same issues? The saying “You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make them drink” is what you need to understand and come to terms with. If you are not aware, it means you can only bring another person but so far. You can see exactly where they need to go, what they need to do, maybe even how and when they need to do it but you can’t do it. It can drive you crazy and it shouldn’t and I’m going to tell you why. No idea what I’m talking about? You may be the horse standing near the water. I don’t want you to be offended unless it will get you to take a sip. In that case, I’ll gladly be the bad guy.
You can give a person hope and they’ll ask for direction. You give that person direction and they’ll ask for the steps to get there. You give them the steps and they’ll ask for help taking them. This is not your job. It is enjoyable and fulfilling helping people but a lot of people will suck the joy and fulfillment out of you if you allow it. Some people are hoarders of information, collecting knowledge with the full intention of using it but never do. These are the people who buy self-help book after self-help book. Attend multiple real estate seminars, pay for the membership only to have the information go from sitting on their shelf to sitting in a box in a basement or storage facility. They buy online educational courses for it to sit untouched with no more than the initial log-in recorded. Some are selfish, willing to drain you for as much information as they can get while giving you nothing. I had a guy see my blog preview videos titled “So…you want to be Rich?” and asked if I wanted to be rich, stating “Please not with my money”. Sentences later he began asking me how to get rich. So let’s get this straight, you took it upon yourself to assume I was selling something and wanted your money. You came to the understanding I wasn’t selling anything and offering information at no cost. You then are all ears and want me to tell you how you can become rich? Amazing. I mean, he didn’t seem so willing to assist me in getting there a couple of sentences prior. Others are glutens for punishment. They are not looking for solutions to their problems. They need their problems. It’s their excuse as to why they are the way they are. They can’t have you coming along and taking away their excuse to be better than what they already are. I mean, what will they have as reasoning for their failures? Themselves? Oh, no way. Can’t have that.
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Let’s turn the attention to the givers. The people who want to help. How can you continue doing what you love while protecting yourself from the black holes of positive energy mentioned in the last paragraph? First, understand you are just leading horses to water. You are not responsible for making them drink or even stay in the vicinity of the water. Your satisfaction should come from knowing you are providing helpful and valuable information that will help people who utilize it. Second, the people who take action will be grateful and pay it forward. This is like you helping people without taking the time to help them. You started something that will help more people than you can imagine. Don’t dwell on the people who choose not to be part of that excellence. Lastly, do it out of the goodness in your heart. It is much easier to have a laid back or lazzi-faire attitude about the utilization of your input if you are not doing it to feed your ego.
In closing, this can be a stressful issue to deal with. When I was younger, it would drive me crazy knowing I just gave a person answers they needed to solve their problem and they put it in their pocket like it was a keepsake. I would take it personally. I’d either stop giving that person my input or blow up at them if I discovered they did nothing with the information I gave them. I learned to deal with these occurrences in different ways which is why I’m sharing this. A person with good intentions shouldn’t have to deal with anger or disappointment in attempting to do a good deed. Consider yourself a consultant. You are here to give suggestions. Some will take your suggestions and apply them. Others will do it their way. Whatever the case, you still get paid.
Food for thought…You do the dishes.
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