A lot of people are going through more than they ever have at this time. Lost jobs equalling lost wages. Lost wages equalling smaller meals, bills piling up, issues going unfixed. Cities are closed so comradery or a simple but temporary escape around others is not readily available without the chance of possibly getting sick.
Yes, you feel you are healthy and may be able to take on the worst of what this pandemic has to offer but if you can’t then a long hospital stay will probably put you into what may seem like an insurmountable challenge. If it’s not getting sick, it can be getting months behind on the rent or mortgage. It may be mounting credit card debt. It can be an unexpected loss of a family member. So much going on at one time you may ask yourself “How Much Can I Bear?”
Those of us who are fairly young don’t know the answer. No, we don’t want to go through these things that make us question our strength but life gives it to us anyway. There is no small briefing or feeling out process. Once you see it coming, you are in it. The problem or problems are there. You discover fairly quickly that it will not be going away by itself. No, this is on you. Are you strong enough? Can you do it? Usually, the answer is yes. The majority turns to the minority because most fold in the face of the seemingly insurmountable task or pass the buck to someone else leaving them with questioning themselves. Either way, they didn’t give themselves the chance to get an answer.
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With them refusing to try and/or passing the buck, there are worse consequences than trying and failing. We discover how much we can handle by doing so. People are extremely resilient and stronger than they believe but stay out of the know because of the act of dodging issues. This is a double-edged sword. You ignore, pass the buck, or give up before attempting to tackle a problem because you don’t believe you can do it. You don’t believe you can do it because you’ve never given yourself the proof you need to no longer feel that way. A never-ending cycle. If you recognize this, please give yourself a shot.
Things go wrong. At times, there is no apparent reasoning. I’m not in the business of or of the mindset that everything happens for a reason. Even if it does, I believe there are always other things that could have transpired that would have taught the same lessons or presented opportunities for the same triumphs but we get what we get in this world. I do understand problems seem to line up back to back or simultaneously to intimidate you or make you question yourself. One way, you can give yourself some early encouragement is to tell yourself that these issues needed to gang up against you to even have a chance at breaking you. One problem has no chance of not being obliterated by you. When you are dealing with a loss whether its possessions, a job, or a person, there is an instant void. The hole is not physical. It will feel like it is but it is not. It will not heal like a physical wound.
When we get injured physically, we wait and nurture that wound until it’s healed. Intangible wounds don’t heal the same way nor do they need to. Some intangible wounds never heal. With intangible wounds, its more about learning to operate with the void. You may or may not be able to replace possessions. The job can be replaced but its replacement will be different even if the pay is the same. A loss of a person cannot be replaced. You learn to operate with that void. You are not weaker. You are still 100% you. Your void is a part of that. It doesn’t subtract from you. Losing something or someone, being presented with problems or issues you never thought about being presented with will make you begin to question yourself. This is the exact opposite of what the reaction should be. The tasks or responsibility presented to you looks like a mountain because you see it and not yourself. How do you look? How do you measure up? What would you look like to that “mountain” if it was a person?
In closing, we must give ourselves more credit in this crazy world. We are capable of handling anything that comes our way. Of course, there are things that we would never want to happen. There are issues we tell ourselves we can’t handle regardless of if it is real or not as a way to speak it out of existence. Not being able to bear it and not wanting to are two different things. If a terrible occurrence or a hard time presents itself in your life, know you can handle it. You can do it. You are good enough. It will be hard. It will come close to breaking you but it will not. You understand that the voids caused by these problems do not need to heal like a physical wound. No, you know that you will get through this and the voids will simply become a part of you but most importantly 100% you.
Food for thought…You do the dishes.
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