People live a life full of aspirations, dreams, and plans. You’d think that would result in tens of millions of us having great stories of how we’ve made our dreams come true. Unfortunately, this isn’t the case. Most aspirations, dreams, and plans die without being chased for long if at all. You live your day-to-day life, and it is full of you doing things you rather not do. It could have been k-12 schooling. It may have been four years of college you did because that is what you do after k-12.

Currently, it can be a job or a relationship you don’t necessarily see improving you as a person. Whatever it is doing, it isn’t helping you get to your dream. Have you ever worked extremely hard on a project at work and didn’t feel as good as you thought you should feel when finished? That is because the fruits of the completion of that project are not for you. Have you been in a relationship where you sense your potential, effort, or insight is devalued? A relationship can hinder your potential in ways many of us don’t see. Your effort can only be appreciated by someone who cannot do it themselves. This inability can be via time or skill. Insight is often unappreciated when the other person in the relationship doesn’t want it or don’t feel they need it. Look for these signs. If you recognized the signs, give yourself a chance.

The chance I’m requesting you give yourself is a chance to get better. Give yourself an opportunity for a better you, better fruit, and better appreciation. You are busting your tail at a job for a raise or promotion, correct? The raise will only be satisfying for a short period because that job is not your goal. The promotion will feel great because it comes with money, praise, and a showing of appreciation. That is cool but, if the career that position is in is not your plan this great feeling will also fade. You’ve proven you can accomplish goals in your life even though many of them were not yours. How great would it be to set your own goals for a change? This action can start on a small scale. You can tell yourself you’ll read a book a month. It may not sound like much to an avid reader. For most of us, that’s 12 more books a year than we would have read. Progress is progress and, the knowledge and joy you gain from the reads are yours forever. Give yourself a chance.

Why don’t we give ourselves a chance? The easy answer is fear of failing. You fail at work, you may not get a raise or promotion. If you do really bad you may get fired but, you can always work for a competitor that needs people with experience. You stay in the relationship because you no longer believe in your potential. You question if anyone will value your effort or need your insight. Most of us find more comfort in being still in the known over the discomfort of the unknown. This stance is a fact regardless of the known sucking. Why? Again, fear of failure. The majority of us don’t realize we see trying as enabling the chance of failure. It also allows the ability to succeed. Failure is not purely negative. The lack of trying or trying again is. Failure tells you “You’ve made too many mistakes to experience success at this time.” Somehow we interpret it as “You are a failure. You sucked. Don’t try again, and I’m going to tell everyone you know.” Wow. Who did that translation for you? They don’t seem very friendly. Was that you? At least you know how to translate it correctly now.

In closing, give yourself a chance. Most of the work you’ve done in your life were goals set by other people accompanied by unfulfilling rewards. I can promise you that accomplishing a goal you set for yourself gives you more fruit than you could imagine. In addition to the great feeling, you also get a boost in confidence for the next goal. After fulfilling a couple of your own goals, you now have a resume that you can look at with admiration. It is not to be used for getting hired to accomplish other people’s goals. It is to be used as confirmation that you setting and completing your own goals is doable and more beneficial to you than completing them for others. I know doing things out of the ordinary is scary but never attempting to be the best you can be is a nightmare enough of us have experienced. Do something different. Give yourself a chance.

Food for Thought…You do the dishes!