Emotional wellness is the ability to handle one’s emotional state and the varied emotions one encounters in life. Emotional Wellness is one of the six sides of the wellness circle. Here we want to focus on the ability to control ourselves psychologically. Reducing stress, quality sleep, positive outlooks, strong relationships, being mindful, and learning to cope with loss can all contribute to obtaining this. How do we do this? Why can we control ourselves in certain scenarios but not in others? We were told holding in emotion was wrong, correct? How exactly will we know when we have achieved Emotional Wellness? All great questions. Let’s discuss.
The best way to achieve anything is step by step. Choose one aspect of emotional wellness and vow to improve in that. For example, reducing stress. The first step can be identifying one contributor to the stress and working to remove it. It can be a person, an environment, or a thought process. Once identified, the trigger is enemy number one in our heads. This identification will assist those who need constant motivation to help ourselves. Once successful at removing the trigger, the second step can be removing another or focusing on preventing the first trigger from ever returning. We will know what is best for us when the time comes.
How about the question of why we can control ourselves in certain scenarios but not in others? This issue has to do with the scenario we are dealing with at the time. At work, we may be able to bite our tongue, but at home or in a disagreement with a stranger in public we seem to have no control. Here we need to give ourselves more credit than we do. We are in control in both scenarios. It is as simple as self-preservation. We know at work, the consequences of blowing up in a rage can cost us that position. Losing that position will cause major issues in our personal and financial well-being. With that understood, we control ourselves.
At home, you can blow up with minimal blowback, at worse, the people in the home are upset with you for a day or two, but bills can be paid, and utilities are still working. In an argument in public with a stranger? There is a large chance it will play out as follows: you yell, they yell, you go in separate directions, and you are both angry on the ride home. Again, no huge repercussions. Keep that in mind when you find yourself inconsistent with your ability to control yourself. You are in total control.
We are told holding in emotion is wrong. Yes, it is, but knowing when, where, and how to release it is vital. If we are experiencing a bad day, taking it out on others is not the solution. We need to train ourselves to hold the frustration until we are away from people. That is the when. The where and the how are up to us. A good workout at home or the gym (with headphones) can be a great release. A nice massage at a spa or the hands of a partner can be just what we need. A nice glass or two of our favorite drink with relaxing music does the trick, also. They all work. We need to find the one that works best for us.
In closing, emotional wellness is a journey in itself. When we choose to jump into attempting to achieve emotional wellness, we need to understand it will be a process. Remember step by step. While we are going through the journey, we’ll repeatedly ask “how exactly do I know when I have achieved emotional wellness?” Here is a quick and simple explanation of a complicated answer. The answer isn’t verbal. We will know when we stop asking ourselves the question.
Food for thought. You do the dishes!
