Most of the time, we are afraid of change. Yes, we enjoy new things, but new things in our comfort zone. That is why we tend to lean towards the status quo. When it comes to making changes, it may take us months to years to make them. This time is why we tend to announce and celebrate our changes. If we thought about the effort the actual task took, we would not be so loud about it. The hurdle was moving forward. Starting is the hurdle we are celebrating. We are afraid of new. The only time we are swift in moving into the “new” is if the present scares us more. What about the times we have agreed, begrudgingly or not, to move forward, and the familiarity is what causes a whole new fear? What do we do when this new beginning is looking all too familiar and not in a good way? What steps should we take to give this “new” experience the embrace it should receive?

First, we should remember this is “new” thing isn’t that old thing. Whatever the “thing” may be, give it a clean slate. How unfair would this stance be if you were the new “thing”? Would you want to be at an instant disadvantage just for existing? No, of course not. In a relationship, this would kill the possibility of a couple of dates growing into a relationship. We would not be able to get past either being the person compared to some stranger or seeing so much in a person that reminds us of who we left. You’ll doom this great piece of “new” by labeling it with traits it may not contain. Let’s not do this.

Instead, take only confirmed familiarity forward. When we have no confirmation of negative familiarity, we need to act accordingly. Remember, this thing isn’t that last thing. Does this new experience remind you of an old one? The question that follows that feeling should be “Is this a positive or negative memory?” If positive, can we confirm it? If so, great use that positive. Use your past, to make this experience even better. Did you lose this perk in the past? Did you not appreciate it as much as you should have? Treat this second chance as if it is your last. If we cannot confirm it, chill. Relax. This isn’t that.

If negative, can we confirm it? If so, move away. There is no need to relive what you already have. You left that situation for a reason. Do we require a second experience? Use your experience to save yourself from future stress. Let’s not allow our hardships to be suffered in vain. If we cannot confirm it, chill. Relax. This isn’t that.

In closing, familiar but new beginnings will happen. We have to know how to deal with it. Familiarity is great. It can be used as a strength rather than an additional method of bringing doubt, uncertainty, and stress into our new situations. One of the most difficult tasks we’ll encounter is refusing to allow false thoughts to determine how we move in life. Knowing of scenarios or at least being introduced to situations like this can be the heads up we need to approach our next “new” thing with full preparation.

I hope we are better prepared than we were before this piece. If we can confirm our feelings of familiarity, we know we can either make the most out of a second chance or remove ourselves. If we can’t confirm our feelings of familiarity, again, we should chill. We should relax and tell ourselves this isn’t that.

Food for Thought…You Do the Dishes!